Why is it that the pangs of doubt have to return so quickly? Everything that felt certain is now being made to feel wrong...though in reality, it's not at all. Matter of fact, it's some of the most right I've been witness to in all my life. I haven't felt the heart wrenching twist of hopes going unrealized in a good long while...until tonight, when everything previously beautiful and easy is hitting me like a ton of bricks.
I cried when I got home.
Like a written off little country girl all alone at 2 am within the walls of a huge, sprawling city... I didn't want to do it. But the bed brought memories of purging skeletons to save the future, and sent my mind sailing back into the first golden moments of pure, honest to goodness brilliance...and that was it.
I remembered your eyes and your hands and the sound of your breathing...that first subtle lean against you...the earth to the sky-that immense space all in a matter of seconds.
...then your voice over the phone at 4 am-yearning for me to be the one who saw the world by your side. I am that girl on the beach with bare feet and flowers in her hair.
And I ain't afraid to wait for something that moves me this much.
1 comment:
Your words are beautiful!! Can't wait to catch a show!
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